Long story (not made short)

Ok, let's go Tarantino here.

My  Norwegian bank called, I didn't answer, and they left me a cryptic message that there had been some suspicious activity on my debit card and that I should call them back right away!

And now, let's rewind to summer 2011 when Lars and I were in the U.S. having a jolly old time. 

 

Right? That looks like a lot of fun. And it was.
We also did some serious shopping while we were there. If I haven't made this clear enough already, basically everything is cheaper in the US than it is in Norway.

Both of us bought iPads from Target, and when we were going to pay in the electronics section, we totally got duped into opening a Target credit card by the Scottish sales representative on shift. Somehow I was thinking that she said we would save 25% on our purchase if we opened the card, which is a significant chunk of change on a such a large purchase. But the deal is 5% of course--if only she would have spoken a language I can understand (like Norwegian)!

But alas, I was confused and went for it. But whatever, 5% is still money saved. And the plan was just to pay it off immediately at customer service before we left the store, so at that point it didn't really matter. But do you think I was able to do that?

Now, remember this story is delivered to you Tarantino style--
My  Norwegian bank called, I didn't answer, and they left me a cryptic message that there had been some suspicious activity on my debit card and that I should call them back right away!

Ok, so Lars and I roll up to the customer service counter after purchasing out iPads to pay off the card. But they don't accept Norwegian cards. Oh no, of course not! Plus, you actually have to have the credit card to be able to pay it off. They are wondering what my credit card number is... How the hell would I know? I just opened it. Maybe the Scottish lady said that we couldn't pay it that day, who knows, she was speaking English after all, and I obviously couldn't understand a damn word of it.

The card never came before our vacation was over (of course), which was by no means the end of the world. All I needed was to get my parents to send over my credit card when it came in the mail (Target does not send to international addresses) so I could pay it online. After the mail monster that lives in my parents' office had regurgitated that envelope a couple months later, I was ready to get that debt (plus interest of course) paid off right away! But of course, the online system at good ol Target does not support international cards. No, no, of course not. So I couldn't pay then either.

I called Target and they had no solution. I was so irritated (and busy!) at this point that I naively decided to ignore it and pay it next time I was in the US. Target doesn't support international cards, I couldn't pay over the phone because I didn't get my account number until 7 months later and yeah, a big cluster fuck.

SO... (we're getting close to the end now) when I sneak-attack visited my family this March I physically visited Target, with my account information and desperately explained that I just wanted to pay this bill! It was no problem to pay with my Norwegian card the representative told me, and I said that was a relief that they finally got that figured out! But do you think it worked that time? No, of course not, it was rejected then as well. I believe that American machines read my Norwegian debit card as credit, and I get that--that you can't pay off credit with credit. But come on, it's not a credit card! (insert tantrum here)

Her best solution was to transfer money to my American account (thank god I still have one of those btw) and pay with my American card. I agreed that that would work just fine, but it takes a couple days to transfer money internationally and I would be on my way back to Norway by then. So I skipped that option and decided to take out about 800$ in cash, pay the bill in person and to put the mess behind me that same day. They conveniently have an ATM right next to the customer service desk (maybe I'm not the only one experiencing these frustrations?)...but of course it ate my card and froze. I had to wait a half an hour to get my card out and was pretty sick of the entire situation by then.

Yesterday I called my Norwegian bank back as soon as I saw I had a missed call, and she explained that there was some suspicious activity in the USA this year. I said that I had been in the US and that I was in fact American, and that I spent quite a bit of money while I was there. She insisted that it was something more than that but never really said concretely what it was, I could barely hear her, wasn't at home so couldn't check for myself, so I just trusted her and said she should cancel my card. It wasn't until later that evening when I got online and saw four withdrawals of 1.182kr (200$) from the same ATM machine in Silverdale, WA that I realized what was fishy.

Yeah, that was me, in a money-withdrawal frenzy in the middle of the Silverdale Mall. I withdrew the same sum four times in a row from the same machine to get enough cash to pay off that damn Target credit card. Apparently that's "suspicious activity". Isn't that totally normal? ;)

So yeah. I have probably canceled my card unnecessarily, but better safe than sorry right?

But wait a second, that was early in March...are they just notifying me of that now? Late in May?
I am guessing that all my money would have been long gone by now if my numbers had been swiped while I was in the US!

Maybe there wasn't a lot of blood and guts, or intrigue in the least, but it was still a twisted, complicated story. À la Tarantino.
The end.

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Babykino *EDIT*

If you're been following along, or have ever been to Norway, you've probably got it by now that some things are a bit different here.

Portion sizes are smaller, foods are less processed, most everyone drives a stick (and not a Hummer) and garages are seldom part of the house. Sick and maternity leave are legit. Like really alright. Maybe even too alright (but hey that's another post for another time!). There's a lot more political parties, a public transport system that works a tad bit better and of course a measuring system that is actually logical.

I feel like more people smoke here. Or maybe more often. And get drunker. Maybe they drink less often, but get more intoxicated when they first get to it (although I must add Norwegians are super stars when it comes to NOT driving drunk!). There's also a lot less of...well everything. Less choice when it comes to food, activities--you name it. And less accessibility. Stores close early on Saturdays, aren't open at all on Sundays or holidays. If you forgot the turkey for Thanksgiving (which is obviously not celebrated here ;) but just a good example), you're out of luck; there's no Albertsons open until five to save the day. There's also the classic "open on Tuesdays, Thursdays and every other Saturday but not from 11-12.30 when they have lunch" kind of hours.

Movie theaters are no exception--I've never encountered one that opens before 4pm. But today while reading the newspaper, soaking up the sun (the weather has been incredible lately!) and drinking a glass of white wine in my bikini on our awesome balcony after a glorious chicken salad dinner, I learned that once in awhile there are 12 o'clock showings at the Hamar movie theater. They are called babykino. Baby means baby, kino means the movies or movie theater...so Baby Theater? Something like that...but the point is babies are allowed--welcome even!

This is one of the many, small reasons why life in Norway makes me smile. What a great offer for moms or dads that are staying at home enjoying the awesome m/paternity leave offered and bonding with their kid over a cinematic adventure, all while simultaneously NOT ruining the entire experience for other kid-free viewers.

Go Norway, I like the your style.
Babykino, what a great idea!
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*EDIT*

I got some great comments on this post right away, pointing out that Babykino in some forms also exist in the US! I suspected this might be true (because seriously, finding things Norway has that the U.S. doesn't is a heavy task!) and thought I threw a disclaimer in there, but that slipped my mind. Must have been the wine. Or the slight sun burn. ;) So that's great. Go USA, I like your style too.

And since I'm in here editing my post already, I would love to give a shout out to my life long friend Tim who is currently living in Australia who wrote me an email commenting on this post. I have copied his work for years and see no reason to stop now. His thoughts cracked me up:

your piece about store hours and such in Norway was close to my heart.  Oz is the same way, it's a strange adjustment some days.

for any of the negatives, I really appreciate how countries like ours (adopted) actually focus on taking care of the populace.  what a novel fucking idea.  what's that?  time off when you bring a new human into the world?  a minimum wage you can actually live on?  healthcare so you won't go bankrupt from a hospital admission?  affordable education?

and for all that, we suffer a lack of 24 hour Walmarts where we can buy cheap shit we don't need at all hours because you can't afford to staff the atrocity.  i'll take it.  

Plus how cool is it that he calls my blog post "a piece"? I love and miss this man. 

And since it is "winter" in Australia, I will conclude with this glorious picture of Tim and myself:

We used to make Muddy Buddies (Chex Mix coverered in everything bad for you and sprinkled with powdered sugar? Nasty) and drive them around to all of our closest mutual friends. Now that's holiday spirit! 

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